What does it mean to be a chosen wife?
It does not refer to the literal act of being chosen, as generally being married means that you were chosen by your partner to enter into covenant together.
But the chosen wife is the wife who has chosen to take up the mantle of biblical wifehood and has chosen to live out how the Bible has instructed us to as wives, as coheirs in the kingdom. There are many ways we do this from submission, to prayer, and even the practical ways of actually helping our spouses (whether its cleaning up behind them because they are exhausted or super busy with work or its getting out there are working just as hard as they do to provide for your family). The goal is always the same be a helpmeet and we choose this.
But there’s something else we need to choose and that is contentment. In this era of social media, we have these accounts on Facebook. Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, and Pinterest and it is SO easy to fall into the comparison trap. We compare our homes, our marriages, our children to people we know and even people we do not know. We compare our everyday life to their highlight reel. Because while we can see our dirty kitchens or messy living rooms, all we see online is their pristine clean photos that may give the impression that its always clean. But we don’t see what goes on behind closed doors. Perhaps there is heartache due to not being able to conceive OR we don’t see the tons of money they spend on a maid service. We may see the beautiful words of appreciation on a birthday or holiday but we don’t see the arguments behind closed doors. And the entire goal is appreciate and water your own grass. Don’t be so quick to wish for what someone else has because you don’t know what they did to get it or what they do to keep it.
Then, there’s avoiding the legalism trap that comes with being wife. As a wife we hold innumerable influence (generally speaking) with our husbands. We are in a position to advise them on matters that concern not only us and our household but also in areas outside the home that may affect others. And because of that we must be extremely careful as to what we say, how we say it, and what we support or do not support. And the legalist aspect to avoid is the attitude that because we do things a certain then everyone should or because we believe something then everyone should or because we are convicted in an area everyone should be convicted in that area. Some women may feel convicted about only wearing long skirts, while others may not have that same conviction. Some may feel that they should never work outside the home and for others that is not ideal nor do they hold the same convictions . It is very dangerous to push our personal feelings and convictions onto others. We run the risk of becoming the very Pharisees that Jesus denounced in the Bible.
So how to do we avoid the legalism trap? It starts with keeping our eyes focused ahead. Realizing that what the Holy Spirit convicts in us, may not be the same in the next person. And my race is my race, and it will not looks the same as the next person’s race and that is okay. Also, appreciate what you have. Comparison is the thief of joy and appreciation. So even if you need to limit your time on social media, do it. It is always for your good and God’s glory to leave comparison alone and run the race set before you.
So do you have any tips on running your race and being appreciative for what you do have? Leave them below!